I know we're only up to August 15th, but this is already the Lawsuit Of The Month.
Update 8/16/04: The Smoking Gun has discovered even more bizarre lawsuits this guy has filed, against Barry Bonds, Bud Selig, and Hank Aaron's bat -- not to mention Nascar, Tony Danza, Plato, the Pope, the cast of "WKRP In Cincinnati," and the Liberty Bell. Details here.